


All I ever wanted to be, was somebody to you

by those_who_run_with_wolves



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Epic Bromance, F/M, NOT OT3, Platonic Soulmates, Quote: I'm with you 'til the end of the line, ShieldShock - Freeform, Some angst, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-17
Updated: 2018-01-24
Packaged: 2018-03-07 22:15:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3185168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/those_who_run_with_wolves/pseuds/those_who_run_with_wolves
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Inspired by amusewithaview's amazing soulmate fics. </p>
<p>In a world where your soulmate identified themselves by saying the same words inscribed on your skin, Darcy had always thought that a person's words would set the tone for their future. Those with sensible, normal words would end up with normal happy lives.</p>
<p>With words like her's...</p>
<p>"I've been looking for you forever."</p>
<p>It was supposed to be dramatic and romantic? Right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. chapter 1

It was supposed to be a good night. Steve had the night off from Avenging stuff and she had the night off from assissting Team Science.

They had both made an effort and they had gone to the movie. Darcy had especially looked for a cinema showing the classics. Old black and white movies that seemed like a good middle ground for them. Something they both could enjoy.

They were halfway through the movie when Darcy had finally felt the tension bleed out of her shoulders and she sunk into her seat when Steve's phone vibrated.

She kept her eyes fixed on the screen as he untangled his hand from her's gently. He took his phone out and she could see the backlight come on, highlighting a text message. It mocked her. Tiny symbols on a phone that destroyed her.

Steve sighed deeply and ran a hand roughly through his hair. "I have to ..." His hand pressed on her shoulder, trying to comfort her.

"Oh," she said, through numb lips. She couldn't look at him. She kept her eyes fixed on the characters on the screen. "Okay."

Darcy could hear her heart breaking yet again even as he placed a tender kiss on her cheek. Like shattered glass, her already battered heart imploded with pure pain.

He didn't even ask her to leave with him anymore. She had stopped making excuses long ago for never going with him.

"You stay and have a good time," Steve whispered. "I'll send Happy to get you when the movie is over."

"Sure," she replied, stiff as a board now in her seat.

Even when he was breaking her heart, he still tried to be thoughtful and kind. But it wasn't enough anymore.

"I'm sorry," Steve said as he stood up.

"Just go, Steve. Bucky is waiting for you." She still couldn't look at him. She just wanted him to go so she could have her heartbreak to herself. She didn't want to cry in front of him again. Darcy Lewis was not a girl who would use her tears as a weapon and she was stronger than this. She had always been. She had just thought that loving her soulmate was supposed to have been easier.

It had to be another panic attack, another nightmare for Bucky. That's probably what the text said. She had seen them all. If it looked like Bucky was in distress, Steve had to be there.

"I love you." He said it like he was trying to make her believe him. Like she was supposed to still believe in them. But Darcy was tired of fighting.

Steve left when she said nothing. She didn't know anymore. Did she still love him?

In the pale light of the screen, she felt the first tears slide down her cheeks. She was grateful that there were few people in the theatre and even more grateful for the darkness that seemed to accept her pain.

She felt the ache in her chest that had become a familiar companion now. What was she to do when her soulmate was still dropping everything for his old friend back from the dead?


	2. Chapter 2

Darcy had many ideas when it came to soul marks. They were words that appeared on a persons skin in their own time. It wasn't an exact science, people would be born and they would go about their lives and then suddenly one day the words would slowly shimmer into existence.

It was also very complicated. Soulmarks gave some people hope. They had something to wait for, to believe in. While for others, who raged against the system, they felt that soulmarks were chains weighing them down and taking away their free will. 

She herself had been seven when she had felt a sting on her wrist. She had looked down at her left hand and slowly the words appeared. Darcy held her breath as "I've been looking for you forever" appeared like a bracelet to wrap around her wrist.

It was beautiful. Both the words and the script warmed her very soul. She was just seven but the idea that someone was going to look for her, it meant that they wanted her and just her. 

Her words gave her courage because no matter where she went, her soulmate would be looking for her. She wouldn't be alone.

Darcy believed that a person's words set the tone for their entire relationship.

Like her own parents. Her mother had taken a trip with family to Colorado for a ski vacation. They had stopped at a place for lunch and the boy serving her mother had said, "You should try the strawberry cheesecake. It's delicious."

Her mother had looked up, "I'm allergic to strawberries."

That's how her parents had met. Those were their words, the words themselves weren't romantic but it set the tone for their relationship.

Darcy's dad took care of her mother. He was mindful of her feelings and he cherished her everyday. Darcy's mother fell in love with the earnestly sweet boy who came with a big family. 

Darcy learned from her parents and her family, to be a Lewis was to be loved. Their family was huge. The restaurant where her parents met was a family business, owned and run by generations of the Lewis clan and that's where she herself had grown up, nestled in the love and positivity of her family. 

Darcy also learned that some words were really strange. Like when she turned thirteen and her friends were starting to notice the opposite sex. She and her best friend Karen had been walking down a flight of stairs at school when a boy they didn't know bumped into Karen.

"What's up dog breath?" He smirked at Karen.

Darcy was horrified. Boys were at that awkward stage were they were trying to flirt but they still needed to retain an edge. They didn't want to get shot down in front of their friends so they had to act mean, even though they wanted to impress a girl.

Karen's jaw dropped and then she started hitting the boy on the back of the head as he tried to duck away from her small fists.

"Seriously? Those are your first words to me?" Karen all but screeched.

The boy froze and he looked at Karen and Darcy felt like she was witnessing something magical.

The boy started laughing then, "I didn't know!" He protested as he grabbed Karen's hands and gripped them firmly between his much larger hands. 

Karen was still glaring daggers at him but she stopped trying to fight.

"I'm sorry," the strange boy said. 

Darcy sucked in her breath as the two teens looked at each other.

"Hello soulmate," the boy said with such reverance that Darcy felt her heart melt.

"That's better," Karen snorted but she had begun to smile.

That set the tone for Karen and Jesse. Their relationship was filled with humour and happiness. They forgave each other easily and they made each other smile.

That was why Darcy knew without a doubt, "I've been looking for you forever" was going to be special. The words promised so much.

She survived highschool and she saw her friends find their soulmates. She saw some of them get their hearts broken by their soulmates and it left them bitter. Those people would get tattoos and cover their soulmarks, then they would do their best to move on with their lives. It was sad to see the failures but people survived.

Darcy went to college, she left home and her family. She still waited for her soulmate and when it didn't look like "I've been looking for you forever" was about to appear, she got a little angry. It wasn't fair, she had been patient her entire life and yet here she was still alone. That happened to some people sometimes. They got their words but they never met their soulmate. It could be attributed to many things. Maybe the person died before they got to meet their soulmate, maybe they were one of the few who wanted free will and chose their own paths.

She was bitter and angry. She went out and tried the random hookups at college parties. She was tired of waiting, tired of hoping.

But then the unthinkable happened. One night as she stood in a guy's bathroom, completely naked as she washed the shame of a late night tryst off her, she felt a sharp sting on the right side of her chest. 

Darcy whipped about, trying to see better in the bad lighting. She held her breasts close together between her hands and tried to get a look. On the sensitive skin along her ribcage, starting from the side of her breast the words went downwards towards her waist and along her torso. 

She stood frozen as a second set of words etched themselves on her skin.

"I'm sorry, I never meant to hurt you." Sloped down her side.

Darcy hung her head in defeat. Here she was waiting for her first soulmate that promised so much, and now she was confronted with a second soulmate. One that was going to hurt her.

Darcy stared at the words, locking them into her memory. She had heard of people with two soulmarks but she had never seen it happening to anyone that she knew personally.

She grabbed her clothes and hurriedly dressed. She was done with one night stands, brief dalliances that numbed the loneliness even for a while.

Darcy touched her side carefully as she walked back to her dorm. She hadn't bothered with saying goodnight to the guy she had just been with. 

She sucked in a deep gulp of the late night air. There were two people out there, one who would be good for her and one who wouldn't. It was time that she started living again. She was done with feeling sorry for herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to amusewithaview and all the other writers who gave us soulmate fics. Your words inspire those who read them.
> 
> Thank you to everyone who takes the time to read my story, leave kudos and comments.


	3. Chapter 3

Darcy's mother had told her, "If you stop looking for the one thing that you want, it will appear on its own accord."

This applied to lost stray shoes, keys and library books. Her mother's advice always worked. Darcy simply stopped fixating on a lost object and she just closed her eyes and simply breathed. She chose to focus on everything but her hearts desire and after awhile, when she re-opened her eyes and looked about the house, she would remember that the missing shoe had been thrown under her bed in a fit of anger. Or the keys were in a coat pocket. The books were in her locker at school or lent to a friend.When Darcy decided to focus on everything but her soulmates, that's when it happened. The universe chose to screw with her, such was her life. Just when she thought that she had some control, that's when everything changed.

Darcy met Jane Foster and in the hot sands of New Mexico, they had found an even hotter hobo who turned out to be Jane's soulmate. The fact that he was Asgardian explained the strange writing on Jane's back. Darcy loved Jane's soulmark. It shimmered with blue and silver as if Thor's magic was a part of Jane's body and soul. Darcy had shared her own pathetic sob story with Jane, who had been understanding and supportive. 

But Darcy was content, she was making a life for herself. She had a good job, she was making friends and she was learning so much. Thor vanished and it was just Jane and Darcy for awhile.

Then Loki tried to take over the world and New York was attacked. After all the madness, the dust settled and Pepper Potts offered Jane a place at Stark Industries.

Jane would have gone to New York anyway. Thor was back and waiting on his lady love. They accepted the amazing job offer. Jane made certain that Pepper Potts knew that they were a team. Jane could be brutal when she wanted something bad enough. Darcy went where Jane did, Miss Potts understood them. That was how Darcy found herself with a healthcare plan and benefits. Words she had heard of but never imagined for herself.

So Darcy packed their bags and she and Jane hopped on a private plane. 

They had an entire floor of the Tower because Thor got an entire floor. He used magic, so the place looked like his home on Asgard. It was a bit much for Darcy with all the fur and weapons that decorated the golden halls, that was why most of the time she wandered about the areas that Jarvis said she had access to. She still felt a little lost so she hadn't been quick to meet the other inhabitants of the Tower.

It wasn't even six months into their stay when the Tower was attacked in the middle of the day. Darcy knew good hiding spots. That's what came from trying to avoid the blissful couples who were all paired off.

She grabbed her taser and her phone and she ran for a storage room. Jane would be in the lab that sealed off automatically. Darcy had been on her way to Starbucks. It was so typical, the bad guys were getting in the way of her coffee fix.

Darcy locked the door behind her and looked around. She hadn't met many of the Avengers but she had met Natasha and Clint. They were always trying to teach her to protect herself. Darcy would never be at the skill level of the Black Widow or Hawkeye but she was book smart and she had a multitude of movie knowledge. A girl learnt a lot from the action movies. She was also a skilled political science major. People saw her outgoing personality and they forgot that she was intelligent.

She valiantly attempted to calm her breathing. She took in her surroundings, seeking out more weapons. She was in a stationery closet. Great, she could staple her way out if she needed to.

It was small and cramped with assorted boxes scattered about. 

"That'll do." Darcy nodded grimly. She placed her belongings on the rough carpet and pushed the boxes together to create a hiding spot. She looked up and saw there were vents in the ceiling slats.

"Jarvis?" She tried. But it seemed that the AI had been knocked out.

No help would be coming for her. She was no one. Maybe when Thor remembered, he might look for her but no, when the big guy was in the throes of a good battle he really got into it.

"I can do this," she reassured herself. She kicked off her shoes so that they lay directly under the vents. Anyone would think that she had escaped through the ceiling.

While Clint was always boasting about how awesome the ceiling was, Darcy knew her upper body strength would not get her up there. She just had to make it look like she had taken that route. She made a small protective fort out of the boxes. They were heavy and filled with paper. "I could give them paper cuts." Okay, hysteria was setting in but she was no shrinking violet.

Darcy hid behind a box, taking shelter in the dark shadows in the corner of the room. Her fingers had a death grip on her taser. She didn't dare call anyone, she didn't want to alert anyone to her presence. Even in the dim corner, the faint light played over her soulmark on her wrist. 

That's when she knew, she was stronger than this. She had come so far, alone and she wasn't about to give up now. But that didn't stop the fear that invaded her mind.

She swallowed thickly and wiped her damp palms on her tights. 

Darcy couldn't help the low groan that escaped her throat when the door opened slowly. Her hand was slick with sweat as she lifted her taser.

She huddled down, trying to appear smaller. Her heartbeat was too loud in the enclosed room. She was terrified that the sound was crystal clear to the bad guy.

She could smell the toner and a hint of gunpowder in the air. The intruder stealthily moved across the floor and she peeked around a box and saw sneakers. He was obviously falling for her ruse because she saw his neck craned up as he looked at the vents.

Darcy pressed a hand to her mouth to cover a whimper that threatened to escape her lips.

She crawled to the back of her box fort and she felt her legs cramp.

She breathed carefully out as she heard him walk past her. The door opened and once it shut, she stood. She had to use the boxes for leverage as she stood. Her muscles felt like jelly.

 

"I've been looking for you forever."

Darcy almost choked on her own tongue. "I've always been good at hiding."

She hadn't expected them to send Steve Rogers to come looking for her. Darcy straightened out and went to retrieve her shoes. "So the attack is over?" It must safe if Captain America was coming to get her. She paused when she realised that he was silent. "What?" She asked, trying to tidy herself.

"I never expected to find you." He was pale and he looked slightly lost. "Even when I came out of the ice."

It hit Darcy then, "You're my soulmate." She felt relief first because she had finally found him. She smiled brightly at him, already imagining the wonderful love story that they would have. It had been worth the wait. He was utterly breathtaking. But she was floored as he looked utterly grim. 

"It seems that way," he shook his head. "I hope that me having to rescue you doesn't become a regular thing."

Darcy felt her head rear back. His words were like a physical blow. She felt her face heating. "I have been perfectly fine without you all my life." She stood up as tall as she could. "I don't need you to save me."

"I'm sorry," Steve replied. He looked distraught at having hurt her but his words were like barbs in her skin.

Darcy didn't give him a chance. She left to go look for Jane. Someone who would want to be around her. She just wanted to get the image of Steve's haunted eyes out of her mind. He looked as if she had destroyed him but it was the other way around for her. Darcy felt as if all her hopes had been obliterated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am blown away by the kind words and the support from all of you.
> 
>  
> 
> Thank you for your kudos, comments and thank you for taking the time to read my story.  
> I appreciate your support and encouraging words.


	4. chapter 4

Darcy wanted to burn his words off her skin. She wanted to erase any trace of Steve Rogers from her life. She went out and got chunky bracelets that covered her wrist. She wore long sleeves. 

But as much as she tried, he was still there. She couldn't forget the lost look in his eyes so she did her best to avoid the man himself.

Darcy kept to her rooms and she stayed close to Jane and Thor. She had shared with them all that had taken place in that doomed stationery closet. Thor was furious, with thunder and righteous indignation, he was ready to defend Darcy's honour. He already had a grip on Mew Mew and he was headed for their front door when Darcy stopped him. She didn't need anyone to defend her honour but she appreciated the gesture.

Jane did her best to keep Darcy busy and that helped.

Days passed but the pain lingered. As much as she denied it, Steve's rejection stung. Her words had been built on a foundation. Now she was forced to rip away the hope, happiness and security it had given her. She lost faith in the universe and the choices she had been given. Darcy had always been strong but this rejection was a staggering blow to her. One by one, she lost the layers of the security blanket that had been her soulmark. He was supposed to have been the perfect soulmate.

Then out of the blue, Steve surprised her. He ambushed her in Jane's lab.

"I'm working." She didn't even pretend to be nice. 

"Please," his voice was desperate but she didn't look up.

"Please Darcy," he had finally said her name. "I don't deserve a second chance but can you give me one anyway? Just to explain."

She lifted her head that suddenly felt too full, as if it had been stuffed with cotton. Her sinuses were sore from crying. She felt sorry for herself but she felt worse for Steve. He still looked neat but his eyes were red rimmed like he hadn't slept in days and she saw his busted up knuckles. He must've been taking his emotions out on a punching bag.

"Fine," she sighed just to put them both out of their misery. 

Jane left the lab to give them privacy but not before pointing two fingers towards her eyes and then pointing them at Steve. The universal sign for "I'm watching you."

Darcy grinned at that, Jane didn't even bother to threaten Steve with Thor, she was perfectly content to take a super soldier on her own.

Steve had the intelligence to nod with understanding. Yes, he got the message loud and clear.

He sat down across from Darcy and she clenched her fists under the table. She didn't want him to see her response to him being so close to her. She felt utterly wretched but she kept her face impassive.

"I need to explain my reaction to you." He started.

But she quickly replied, "It's fine. You don't need to explain anything to me."

"But I do," Steve's voice was raw. He took in a deep breath and she tried to be patient because he was trying.

"Everyone knows my story," he spoke softly. "I had a soulmark but I never found my soulmate."

"Everyone knows that," Darcy nodded because the information had been in all his files and in history books. It was even common knowledge on display at museums. "Everyone knows that even though you never found your soulmate, you still had a serious relationship with Peggy Carter."

"That's true." Steve smiled with a hint of bitterness. "But no one knew about Bucky. He was my brother, my best friend. When I was sick, he'd take care of me. Every fight I got in, he had my back. We didn't have much." He took a deep steadying breath. "Even when we had nothing we still had each other. Then I met Peggy and she knocked me off my feet. She wasn't just a pretty dame. She had a heart of gold and she fought so darn hard for her place in the world."

Darcy didn't even try to hide her sympathy. 

"Peggy looked at a small guy with big dreams and she believed in me. I thought that was it for me. I didn't need to look for my soul mate. I felt that I was lucky enough to have a girl to love and the equivalent of a platonic bond with my best friend. It was more than one man deserved." 

She saw a multitude of emotions play across his face.

"Peggy, I found out recently," he went on, "she found her soulmate and she loved him. They fell in love and they got married. She had a few kids, a nice life." Steve swallowed thickly. "Bucky had words and I had words."

"But they weren't a match," she finished for him.

"Bucky fell down a mountain side and he never found his soulmate but he had me. I loved the two of them. The kind of love that sinks all the way to your bones. The deep love that gets under your skin and never lets go. It stays with you and I still remember it like it was yesterday." Steve bit down on his lip.

"Now you feel guilty because you found me." Darcy breathed out. She wanted to offer him comfort. She wanted to tell him that she would take his pain away because that's what a soulmate did. They took away all the pain and all the doubt. A soulmate was meant to make up for all the wrongs that life threw at a person. But she said nothing because she wouldn't beg or ask for a chance to comfort him.


	5. chapter 5

Darcy stared patiently, allowing Steve to collect his scattered thoughts.

She sucked in a deep steadying breath through her mouth as she had a good chance to stare shamelessly. It was a grave mistake because in the closed confines of the lab, she smelt Steve. His scent permeated all the way into her pores. He held himself steady and he still tried to fold himself lower. Darcy could see the skinny guy behind the too tight t-shirt. 

Steve forget just how imposing he was but the kid from Brooklyn still lingered.

Darcy leaned back in her chair, trying for the illusion of some distance at least but Steve seemed to dominate the room. He was unleashed power and pure adrenaline.

Her words tingled on her wrist. It was as if her soul sensed the owner of those words and without thinking about it, her hand lifted slowly, trying to reach out to the one who was meant to complete her. But Darcy quickly stifled the impulse and she grabbed a pen instead and used it to get rid of the nervous tension. 

  

Thankfully, Steve hadn't noticed. He closed his eyes and fisted his hands, he roughly rubbed his knuckles against his eyes. She noticed the shadows that stained the skin around his eyes.

She huffed quietly, at least she wasn't the only one losing sleep over this. She honestly didn't want him to grovel but she wanted him to earn her trust because she wasn't some airhead that would be taken in by the shiny wrapping that her soul mate came with.

Darcy did not want Captain America. She wanted to see Steve Rogers. 

"Bruce says that I have something called survivors guilt." He looked at her, clearly making an effort. "I can't, I don't want to allow myself to be happy."

"Because of Bucky and Peggy?" Darcy prompted.

 

"You don't know what it's like Darcy," he grimaced. "I went into the ice. The last thing I remember is making plans with Peggy, to go dancing and now a part of me feels like I'm cheating on Peg."

"I don't know what you're going through Steve. But it's not my fault. I didn't ask to be your soul mate." She laughed and there was a raw edge of hysteria to it. He had sacrificed so much and she pitied him but that didn't make it any easier for her. "I was a little girl when I got my words and it gave me so much. I felt secure and wanted." Darcy lowered her head and allowed her loose curls to conceal her face. She felt a distinct prickling as her eyes filled with tears. But she wouldn't look at him. No man was worth the amount of tears that she had spilled in the last few days. 

"I hurt you and I didn't make things right," he replied. "I tried to talk to you but between Jane and Thor, I couldn't get to you."

 

She snorted, "I have great friends." She left the unspoken judgement hang in the air. She wanted him to know that she had people to count on.

She didn't need him. Darcy was more than her soul marks and she definitely wasn't going to share her second mark with him.

"I know," he was trying to placate her, "I used the time though. I went to see Peggy and I think I'm ready to let go of her. Peggy let go a long time ago." It looked like it hurt him to admit that but there was also an air of relief. 

"But you can't let go of Barnes, " Darcy sighed ruefully. She clenched the pen so tight that she felt the plastic crack under her skin. 

"I will never forget those who I loved but I want, no I need to give us a chance to see where this goes." He smiled at her and Darcy felt her traitorous heart flutter as his blue eyes raked over her face. 

He stood up and fumbled with something in his back pocket. 

Darcy tried to maintain an air of disinterest but she saw how his hair fell over his forehead. Was that possible, to admire his high, elegant brow and be turned on by his fine feathery eyelashes that brushed against his skin? 

Steve pulled out a notepad with a big smile of relief. "This is a list of things. Sorta like a to do list." 

Darcy accepted the proffered notepad with a great deal of trepidation. She opened it up to the first page, there were all sorts of random items. The Star Wars movies, music and a veritable overload of pop culture references. 

She couldn't conceal her smile when she saw several items crossed off. Steve was clearly immersing himself in the present.

She turned to the most recent page and scrawled across it, in huge letters was "Make Darcy smile again." 

She held her breath as her eyes went down the page. 

"Show Darcy her words on my skin."

The words were getting blurry but that was because she felt the tears trickle down her too hot cheeks.

He had pressed so hard with his pencil that the page bore signs of damage.

Darcy felt as if her throat had dried up. Her hands were shaking as she handed the book back to him.

 

"You aren't going to finish reading it?" His voice was soft and filled with disappointment.

She hastily shook her head, so fast that she felt a little dizzy. "I want time to think this through Steve." She finally allowed herself to grasp his hand. 

Darcy felt as if she had been in one of Thor's storms, the air felt charged with attraction. They were drawn to each other, such was the magic of the soul mark. 

"You really hurt me and I just want to think this through." She let go of his hand and he made a sound of protest. "Please Steve." She just wanted some time to think his offer through. He had rejected her and it had cut deep.

"Okay," he nodded, clearly not happy with her hesitation. "I'll wait to hear from you."

Darcy smiled stiffly and he walked out of the lab.

She dropped her head down onto the table and groaned, she wanted to accept his apology but she didn't know. She didn't want to be hurt. 

"Love is for children." 

 

Darcy whirled around on her chair, the Black Widow was a freaking ninja.

"Steve is always busy saving the world, Darcy." Natasha stood in front of her. "Who will save him?" And with that, the redhead left as silently as she had appeared.

Darcy felt like she had been given sage advice. Natasha didn't get involved in anyone's business except for Clint.

"Don't let anyone tell you what to do about your soul mate."

"Stop sneaking up on me!" Darcy snapped at Tony. 

"Sorry kid," but his smirk was unapologetic, "I'm going to tell you something but if you ever tell anyone that I spoke to you about feelings." The look of horror and disgust on his face made her smile.

"I promise." Darcy replied quickly. 

"I didn't want anything to do with my soul mate, I saw my parents. The universe thought that my parents belonged together?" Tony sat down across from her. "A workaholic and an alcoholic? I thought the idea of being with someone who I didn't choose, I wanted nothing to do with it." He sighed deeply and Darcy got a rare glimpse at the vulnerability that Tony hid from the world.

He smiled softly, "I pushed Pepper away but I couldn't stop myself from falling in love with her. Not because she was my soul mate but for the person she is." He fiddled with the pens on the table. "So I'm telling you that you can make a choice, don't let anyone tell you that Steve is the one for you. It has to be your choice."

Darcy didn't know what made her confess to Tony Stark of all people. "I have two soul marks."

"Whoa!" He looked terrified by the very idea. "You've got a lot to deal with kid. I don't envy you." He stood up. "I was never here but if you need anyone to talk to I might listen." He tried to be nonchalant but his kind gesture was clear. 

"Thanks," she said sincerely.

"It's your life Darcy, don't let anyone else choose your destiny for you."

He left and Darcy felt that she was lucky to have so many people who cared. But like Tony said, it was her choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for not updating sooner but RL has been hectic.  
> Thanks for reading and commenting. Thank you to everyone who left kudos, your support is appreciated. Thanks for the kind comments, it means the world to me.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New beginnings and the faint stirring of hope.

Darcy wished that she could say that she was a good person and she had forgiven Steve. But she wasn't a saint, she fell more in the category of sinners. Such was her path and she was comfortable with who she was.

Forgiveness was easy, forgetting was harder. Her soul mate had rejected her when she had first met him. His cold rejection of her had dashed all the hopes she had held dear as a child. 

Darcy pondered over her last conversation with Steve but she was not making it easy for him. The bitter taste of rejection still lingered. She kept busy in the labs and she herded her little group of scientists. They needed her. Being wanted and needed made her feel better.

To be fair, no one took sides. Soul mates were different for everyone and it was an intimate matter. But Darcy was touched by the support that Jane and Thor showed her. Strangely enough Tony was being a tad kinder but that served to work on her nerves. She found herself missing Tony and his signature snark. 

"You can ignore everyone Darcy," Jane said one morning. "But you cannot ignore a direct Stark Industries official memo."

Feeling confused, Darcy looked up from her work space where she had been attempting to make sense of random bits of paper. Jane and Bruce had pulled an all night science bender. The table top was covered in paper and they had scribbled on a few coffee cups and even on the backs of receipts. Darcy shook her head, genius made no sense sometimes. But hey, she was just a minion. A well paid minion who put the cups in sealed bags, just in case. She hummed the CSI theme song under her breath as she gingerly went through the mess.

Jane frowned as she read the official missive, she huffed impatiently and ran a hand through her long hair, managing to find a pencil that had been caught in a snarled knot. Her ire was shared between the offensive pencil and the document in her hand.

Darcy shook her head as she smiled with genuine affection. Jane was one of a kind, maybe that was why she belonged with Thor. Jane was a tiny bundle of brilliance mixed with a large dose of clinical curiosity. The god of Thunder was all muscle and heart. 

Darcy was just glad that her friend had found the yin to her yang. "What's got you all worked up boss lady?" 

"The Avengers, the entire team and their plus one have to attend," Jane started pacing. "Some genius decided that we have nothing better to do on a Friday night. We all need a family night. The memo is from Pepper. It's meant to be a team building thing."

Jane started pacing, "Don't they understand?"

Darcy leaned back in her swivel chair, "Sadly, and I hate to break this to you boss lady but science isn't on Pepper's list of priorities."

Jane actually whimpered at that. 

"Sacrilege, I know." Darcy resisted the urge to cackle. "But hey, you and the big guy can go. You need a break and Tony will probably fly in some ridiculously talented chef. Have an expensive date night without even leaving the tower." She shrugged, not showing more sympathy. 

"Uh, Darce, " Jane grimaced, "You count as Steve's plus one."

"Hell to the no," she reared back in her chair. "No way." She frantically tried to think, gears churning in her mind. "Oh, I feel a cold coming on." She coughed into her clenched fist.

Jane rolled her eyes, "Yeah, no one is gonna buy that." 

"Fine," Darcy groaned, "but I don't have to like it."

That was how Darcy found herself dragging her feet, as she followed Jane and Thor to the group dinner the following Friday night. 

The big guy seemed to pick up on her reluctance and he drew her closer to his side. Thor gave the best hugs. Darcy was tempted to bury her face into his red cape as Jane hugged her from the other side of the Asgardian. Thor smelt like ozone and powdered sugar and Jane smelt like ink and jasmine. It was a strange combination of scents but to Darcy, it smelt like comfort and home. 

Life would have been easy if these were her soul mates but no, her first soul mark had led her to an astronomical fool. 

"If anyone dares to threaten the well being of my ladies, I will seek vengeance." Thor's chest rumbled against Darcy's cheek. 

"Yup," Jane nodded. "We will kick their behinds." 

Darcy giggled a little teared up. She could imagine Jane threatening Steve on her behalf. 

She straightened up and looked at her closest friends, "It's no biggie." She took a deep breath and smiled widely. "It's just a meal, I faced worse and I will get through this." 

Jane's frown faded and Thor chuckled heartily. "You are brave, little lighting sister." That faith alone made Darcy feel better.

Darcy held her head high as they headed to the communal kitchen. She had faced gods and the Destroyer, she would not let a man bring her down. 

Thor entered the room and his presence was enough that she and Jane blended into the group with ease. They took their seats around the large dinner table. Almost everyone was there. Steve wasn't there as yet and Tony was already arguing with Pepper over at the bar.

Darcy greeted Bruce and she smiled at Natasha and Clint. The brunette observed the people in the room. She glanced at the back of Bruce's knuckles. Betty Ross had marked Bruce and the Hulk as hers. It was just sad that General Ross disagreed. 

She was attempting to be subtle. Her eyes passed over Tony and Pepper who just seemed to make all the sense in the world. Pepper balanced Tony without even trying. Her eyes passed over Clint. Now, his soul mate was a sore topic. It literally was. Bobbi Morse had married the archer and then she had tried to kill him. No one mentioned the B word around Clint, especially since Coulson had added her to his new team. 

Clint grimaced as he met her eyes, it was as if he could read her thoughts. Natasha noticed his tense body language and quickly placed a smacking kiss on his cheek. Clint smiled under her touch. Darcy noted the ease and familiarity between them. Natasha had met her actual soul mate when she became a spy. She had even been allowed to marry him as part of her cover. They had been the lead dancers in the ballet company. But then he was killed and something snapped in Tasha. 

That was until Clint had found her. Then the Russian assassin defected. Perhaps they had realized that they were two broken souls but together, they were so much more. 

Darcy watched Thor surreptitiously add more food to Jane's plate as the tiny astrophysicist became engrossed in a conversation with Bruce. She smiled. That was love at its best. Taking care of someone without needing any reward for it. 

She looked at the crowded table. There was an actual feast. Pepper had tried for an informal theme though because there were bowls of everyone's favorite dishes with spoons in them so that people could help themselves. She swallowed thickly and she added some mac and cheese to her pristine plate.

Darcy picked up her fork and tried to take a small bite. It was delicious, she could taste a variety of cheeses and cream in the dish but the food stuck in her throat.

She had over reached. She was clearly not up for conversation and now the food was threatening to choke her. Her hands trembled as she looked about the table. The looks of love and happiness surrounding her threatened to send her fleeing the room. 

She put her fork down and her hands went to her thighs, her blunt nails drumming against the smooth fabric of her jeans. She sat stiff in her seat. 

But then with the barest of touches, she felt someone clasp her slightly clammy fingers. Darcy turned wide-eyed, Steve had managed to sit beside her and without making a fuss, he took her much smaller hand in his. He didn't look at her. He didn't draw attention to her, he calmly and slowly ate from his plate. 

Steve held her hand in his and for the first time in her life, Darcy took a deep breath. His touch did something to her. She felt the connection between them all the way down to her bones. Her body felt grounded. She felt as if she had been asleep her entire life and now, finally someone was waking her. The light caress made her blood sing. There was a gentle peace in her very soul that left her warm. The barest brush of his fingers eased the weary pain in her heart and finally, she could breathe. 

This was what it was supposed to feel like, she realized. Her shoulders sagged, Darcy felt whole for the first time in her life and that was because a part of her was with her. Steve was a part of her and maybe they could start again. He smiled at her, he felt it too. That much was clear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading.  
> 


	7. chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading and thank you for all the kind comments that you guys leave.

Darcy made peace with her circumstances. Fate had dealt her a colossal low blow. The first introduction with her soul mate had been a while ago and the hurt had rankled. But she was not some weak willed damsel in distress. She refused to be. After the chemistry that she had felt, she knew that there was so much possibility. 

With that fire blazing through her veins and her head held high, Darcy walked into Steve's personal old timey gym and laid down the law. 

Steve had been in the process of boxing out his angst. He reared backwards as she headed towards him. The doors slammed shut behind her and the mat floors masked her angry stomps.

Oh, the man had no right to look so good when he was all sweat soaked and completely out of breath. He glistened, it was ridiculous and her mind froze as she smelt him. He smelt manly and clean. She swallowed thickly as her eyes followed a track of moisture that ran down his throat. She licked her lips and she was grateful to see that his eyes widened as he stared at her mouth. 

That just steeled her nerves. She crossed her arms and stared him down. Which was no easy feat as he was taller than her. 

Steve panted lightly but said nothing. He was letting her take the lead. He grabbed a water bottle and he lifted his head back and quickly quenched his thirst. 

Darcy almost whimpered, almost. But she bit down on the inside of her cheek. "I'm ready to talk to you." 

Steve put the water bottle down and he opened his mouth to speak but she lifted a hand to stop him.

"It's your turn to listen soldier." His eyes darkened but he just nodded. He was a class act, he lead a team of unruly avengers but he let her instruct him. And she planned on schooling the man out of time about the modern woman. "It's meant to be a given. I'm supposed to let you get away with your mistakes because some supernatural force chose you for me. I'm supposed to smile and be accepting of your flaws."

She huffed angrily, "I'm completely tolerant of people. I let Tony steal the last of my chocolate stash, I don't say anything to Thor when he leaves an almost empty milk carton in the fridge and when Clint hogs my jellybeans, I know its because he needs it more than I do. But I draw the line at anyone disrespecting me for no reason."

Steve's shoulders slumped but she powered through her rant.

"You have to earn me. If you want me, then I suggest that you step up and woo the heck out of me. Court me like you've never done with anyone else. I'm not going to simper and bat my eyelashes at you because of the writing on my skin. If you want me, you have to get to know me and I guarantee you, I am worth the effort." 

Darcy lifted her chin. "If I decide to take the plunge and trust you, then you should know that I will be prepared to walk through the fires of hell for you. I will give you all of me but you're going to earn me. If I decide that you aren't right for me then we can be platonic soul mates or if you want we can cover the soul marks with tattoos, like so many other people who chose their paths in life. We can be like Clint and Natasha, they chose who they love."

"I will make this right. I want to be worthy of my soul mark. You may not believe me just yet, Darcy but when I touch you, I know that I need you as much as I need oxygen to survive. I've made many mistakes but letting you go won't be one of them." Steve replied and his voice was low and husky. He stood tall and proud. He was a man on a mission.

Darcy nodded and smiled brightly, "Good for you soldier. I'll be waiting."

 

She walked away and didn't look back but she felt his eyes on her. She knew that he would heed her advice or he would lose her. Love was about the tough choices and life had left her slightly jaded. She had waited for such a long time for not one but two soul mates. It hadn't been very positive so far.


	8. chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading.

When Tony and Steve had decided that they were going to avenge the earth, they hadn't realized that it was a 24 hour gig. 

That's why the next time that Darcy saw him, Steve was on the news and fighting Doctor Doom in Brooklyn. 

She and Jane huddled up in front of the tv. The tower was on lock down and while they were safe,  they were still worried about the people that they cared for. 

Darcy flinched as Steve hurled his shield at a doombot and jumped over a car. Her nails dug into the soft flesh of her hands as she clenched her fists.

He moved with a fluid grace, he was beautiful in his takedown of the metal menaces. Her eyes stayed on Steve as the rest of team fought just as hard. She stared at the look behind the mask. The eyes that were so focused and seemed as hard as diamonds. There was no softness to him when he was the Captain. He moved with a determined take no prisoners approach.

But she somehow saw through the suit, she saw the clenched jaw and she knew that Steve was snapping commands through his ear piece to the rest of the team. 

"I look at Steve and I wonder what it must've been like when he was little and fighting bullies." Darcy couldn't help but muse. 

"I don't think he was any different," Jane replied. "He may have been smaller but you and I both know what its like to be underestimated. Steve just didn't want to let the bad guys win. Whether he was serum enhanced or not, he just couldn't stand for it."

Darcy nodded. She and Jane had survived two alien attacks. People always doubted their strength but when it came to protecting the world and those they loved, both women had dug deep and fought hard.

"Some men," Jane went on, "they don't need serums or magic. Their hearts are pure. Even if you have to look past the bad stuff, you find that guy and if you're lucky enough then you see his heart."

Darcy knew that her friend was thinking of New Mexico and how Thor had been a first class d-bag but they had stuck with him and he had grown as an individual. Thor had changed dramatically from the spoiled prince that had lost his hammer. He had learnt to be humble and considerate.

"When Thor fought for our files and all the things that the suits took from us, that's when I realized that he cared." Jane blushed, she didn't always say much but she was the big sister that Darcy had always wanted. 

"You're kind of smart," Darcy teased bumping her friend's shoulder. "Consider my mind blown. There's so much more to you than science."

Jane laughed. "Don't tell anyone." Her face was serious suddenly. "I'm not saying that Steve is perfect but he's trying. You need to look past the bravado and the image."

Darcy sighed, when Jane wasn't on a science bender she was very coherent. "I'd like to. I want to see past the dancing monkey and give the man a chance."

"Good." Jane turned back to the television. "I just want you to try and if it doesn't work out we can go somewhere else."

Darcy swallowed thickly, she was lucky to have Jane. 

Her attention was on the screen again and she had to stifle a scream as Steve was tossed through the air like a rag doll. Doom wasn't fighting fair.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's short but I'm back : )

Darcy was waiting for Steve to get off the quinjet. Jane had already led Thor away to wash off the battle dirt, thankfully the god of thunder seemed fine.

"Hey Lewis, your boy is fine. I saved him." Tony smirked as he sauntered over to her spot on the wall. His helmet was off and the suit looked a little worse for wear. 

"Your goatee is kind of singed." She grimaced at the smell of burnt hair. 

Tony cackled, clearly still on an adrenaline high. "Who knew that Doom had added missiles to his bots? That guy needs a new hobby."

"Something that isn't Reed Richards or trying to blow up the city," Darcy agreed. "Thanks for flying Steve out of the way."

"I had 'em," Steve muttered angrily as he walked towards her. 

Tony just shook his head, "Captain America, ladies and gentlemen. You're welcome Lewis, I'm just gonna go..."

"Trim the facial hair," Darcy nodded. 

The team filed off the roof and it was just the two of them. 

"I swear, I had it under control. The missile wouldn't have done much damage." He looked exhausted and his suit was more char than blue. His hood was in his hand and the shield was strapped to his back.

Her heart went out to him then. His hair sticking up and his cheek bruised, he kept his head held high. In that moment, Darcy saw the little guy from Brooklyn. 

She reached out a hand to grab one of his. "That's why you have a team Steve. They are there to help you."

A flush of red crept up his neck. "I know."

"Come on. Let's go get you cleaned up." She held onto his dusty gloved hand and led him down to his floor. 

He was quiet, content to let her take care of him. So she gently but firmly got him to his floor and Jarvis, considerate bro that he was, opened the door for her. 

"I'm supposed to be sweeping you off your feet. You shouldn't have take care of me." He sat down, a man who seemed to hold the weight of the world on his weary shoulders.  

"Maybe if you have someone to share your problems with, it might make life a little easier. If you want, you have me in your corner. You're not alone." Darcy swallowed thickly. She didn't wait for his reaction, choosing to go into the bathroom. She found a wash cloth and ran it under some warm water. She went back to her soul mate and he closed his eyes and let her wipe the grime of his face. 

The silence was soothing, as if they had found middle ground. It was a start.


End file.
